


friday night and the lights are low

by astrumiilius



Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self-Aware
Genre: Dancing, M/M, gordon oblivious moments, just general cringe lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:46:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24531016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astrumiilius/pseuds/astrumiilius
Summary: As soon as Gordon caught on to what he was saying, he stopped in his tracks. “Benrey, are you trying to tell me you don’t know how to dance?”The flush on Benrey’s cheeks got darker. “Whatever, man, not like I’d want to. Mega cringe.”--aka gordon is gay and oblivious and i just wanted to write them having a moment
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 27
Kudos: 411





	friday night and the lights are low

**Author's Note:**

> hhrhfhf........i havent written any sort of fanfiction in literal years and its 2:30am so. have fun w this is all i can say ig

“Alright, gang,” Gordon drawled, removing his helmet and shoving his backpack off of his long-suffering shoulders, crumpling over it on the floor, “this seems as good a place as any to set up for the night.”

“Excellent idea, Gordon!” Dr. Coomer said, already beginning to punch out what remained of the room’s computers--which, admittedly, wasn’t much. It looked like a pack of peeper puppies had already ran through here, tearing it apart in their wake, but Gordon hoped it was long enough ago that they could be at least somewhat safe here. He didn’t want to keep running through the night again.

He dragged his heavy eyes away to survey how everybody else was doing. Bubby was sitting cross-legged by the row of computers Coomer was so lovingly smashing; Tommy was sat down just next to Gordon, holding his feet and rocking himself back and forth while he muttered something to himself--Gordon caught the words “Wikipedia” and “microwave” and decided he didn’t need to listen any further; and Benrey was perched on top of a tall metal filing cabinet at the other end of the room, one knee brought to his chest, as he stared out the little window at the unceasing desert beyond they had been trying to escape for who-knows-how long now. As things went, everybody seemed to be pretty normal, which Gordon was grateful for.

But he knew he couldn’t lay here forever, no matter how hard his muscles ached and begged for rest. With a sigh, he sat himself back up. His bones popped and he hissed through closed teeth as he tried to stretch out his tired muscles. He needed to set up camp before they stopped working altogether. 

Once he began to bring his sleeping roll out, everybody else followed suit--everybody except Benrey, but that wasn’t surprising. Benrey never seemed to participate in that sorta stuff, and Gordon really should have just let him be, let him sleep on the cold floor for all he cares, but, well, he’d always been too soft for his own good.

Even worse was that Benrey refused to carry his own backpack around, so Gordon had resigned to carrying his sleeping roll as well in his backpack. It was inconvenient, weighed him down, and limited the amount of food he could carry, but he could never bring himself to stop. Sometimes, even when Benrey had run off to god-knows-where, Gordon would set his roll down anyway, just in case. Sometimes, he’d even be there when he woke up.

Gordon watched him now as he put down the ungrateful wretch’s roll. He wasn’t paying a lick of attention, still staring right out that tiny window near the top of the ceiling. Gordon wondered what he was thinking about.

Sometime between the last time he looked at him and now, he’d begun to sing to himself, sweet tones of blue and purple bubbling from his lips and orbiting around him. There was something so strangely, uniquely beautiful about the Sweet Voice; the inhuman whistling combined with the coloured balls of light that accompanied it. Gordon wondered if he’d feel differently about it if it came from anybody but Benrey’s lips. He told himself it’d probably be better, actually, that the fact that his only exposure to it was _Benrey_ made it seem less impressive than it really could be. He ignored when his gut told him it was already one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen. 

Benrey turned to him then, caught him staring. “What are you looking at, Feetman?” he asked, accusatory.

Gordon’s breath caught in his throat and his hands flew back to their task. “N-nothing, man, just wondering why you’re being so lazy up there, jeez.”

Benrey scoffed and returned his gaze to the window.

Behind him, Tommy tapped his shoulder gently. “Do you need help with dinner, Mr. Freeman?” he asked.

It brought a soft smile out of Gordon. “Yeah, thanks Tommy.”

Dinner was little more than salvaged protein bars and freeze-dried whatevers they’d found along the way. It sucked, and tasted like dirt, but it was food to fill their tummies and rejuvenate their aching muscles. It made Gordon think about the kinds of food he could eat once he got out of here: real, fresh vegetables; hot food that was _cooked_ ; pizza _(man, he could kill for some pizza)_. And he’d never, ever, have to even look at another dull, grey protein bar ever again. His stomach grumbled with the very idea of it, and he felt a new spur of energy to _get the hell out of here._

With a great heave and a long groan that sounded more akin to something that would come out of an old man, Gordon pulled himself to his feet, his legs dull and heavy but still holding him up. They were running low on rations, like always, and he thought he should check the surrounding area for something, anything, they could take with them. Normally, he’d go on his own, but today had been a long day, and his arms were so tired; if he found something he wasn’t sure he’d be able to bring it back on his own. 

“Benrey!” he called while he stretched out his arms above his head, eyes closed as he listened to those satisfying pops. When he opened them once again he found Benrey already watching him.

“Wha? What do you want?”

Gordon sniffed and wrinkled his nose, putting himself back together. “I’m going scavenging and you’re coming with me.”

“What?” Benrey scowled at him. “No I’m not.”

“Yeah, you are, man, come on.” He stomp, stomp, stomped his heavy boots over to the filing cabinet Benrey was sat on, before grabbing hold of his ankle and yanking him down. 

_“Yargh!”_ Benrey cried out, trying to cling onto anything he could to keep his highground, but Gordon was bigger and stronger and he tumbled unceremoniously onto the ground. “Ow, what was that for?”

Gordon was already tugging him to his feet, and while he huffed and moaned, Gordon wouldn’t take no for an answer. “I’m tired of your bullshit. Come on.”

He took them into the next room over to search, and when they found nothing interesting, they moved onto the next, and the next. And while Benrey berated him, and Gordon teased back _(“Little baby too stupid to look at rooms by himself, huh?” “Little baby too stupid to put out his own sleeping roll, huh? Need his Gordo to do it for him? Wah wah.” ... “Damn, bro, don’t need to be so mean.”)_ he was pretty good at this scavenging stuff, it turned out. He’d found half a pack of batteries and an unopened packet of gummies where Gordon hadn’t even thought to look. It wasn’t quite the haul he was hoping for, but it was better than nothing, and the batteries would come in useful for their few remaining flashlights. 

Gordon leaned back against a desk littered with paraphernalia: novelty pens, sticky notes, pictures of a young family smeared with dried, black blood. This had been somebody’s desk, less than a week ago, but the bloodstains trailing out the door told Gordon it didn’t belong to anybody anymore. It made him wonder about his own family. His ex and little, darling Joshua. Were they okay? Had any of these creatures made it out of the facility? Did they know what happened to him? Would...would Joshy know that his daddy hadn’t abandoned him, that he’s coming for him as soon as he can? He hoped so. More than anything, he hoped so. He thought about his little boy crying when he heard his dad was missing, that he might not be coming back, and had to close his eyes for a moment. 

A clatter from across the room broke him out of it, followed by a mumbled curse. “Fuckin’, uh...box bit me.”

“Let me see.” Gordon said gently, crossing the room in a few large steps. He grabbed Benrey’s fingers and turned them over to look at them. There was a small pinch, the skin turning a slight red, but nothing more. “You’ll live.”

Benrey stole his fingers back, averting his eyes. “Yeah, uh...whatever, d-dumbass.” 

Gordon just scoffed, and went to see what it was that ‘bit’ Benrey in the first place, shoving his hands down into the metal chest. What he pulled out was...unexpected. It was an old CD player, covered in a layer of dust and grime, but it looked, for all intents and purposes, undamaged. He figured it must have been the CD cover snapping shut that caught Benrey, and he opened it back up to see what was inside. It seemed to be a collection of cheesy pop songs from all over the decades. It could have been worse, he supposed. 

“Hey, do you wanna see if this thing works?” he asked, shaking the plastic box around with one hand.

Benrey had still been clutching his fingers, but he looked up at that. “Huh? ...Oh, uh, sure, I don’t care.” He went back to looking at his fingers. 

Gordon took that as a yes. He popped off the back, slipped two batteries from earlier in, and turned it on. And almost had a heart attack when it started blaring music at full volume.

That dragged Benrey back out of his stupor. He chuckled at Gordon’s yell, a lopsided thing that was half sharply pointed teeth, but held no ill-intent, and caught the CD player when it fell out of his hands.  
Gordon shook his head, blowing out a shaky breath as he lowered the volume. Christ, he was jumpy. He closed his eyes, then, listening to the music coming from the tinny speakers. He didn’t notice Benrey put the thing down on the desk, wondering how long it had been since he’d heard anything other than the sound of whirring machines and snarls of distant creatures he hoped were just echoing far down the empty halls. But now, here he was, listening to real, human music; a cheesy pop song he remembered singing along to in his youth. He smiled. And then he laughed, and opened his eyes to see Benrey reclining against the desk, arms across his chest, watching Gordon with a quizzical expression. 

“You don’t like this song?” Gordon asked.

Benrey shrugged. “Pretty shit, mate.”

That made Gordon laugh again. “That’s half the fun.”

A smile crept onto the corners of Benrey’s mouth as he shook his head lightly and cast his gaze away. A stray strand of long, black hair had fallen from his helmet at that and passed across his face. Gordon had never seen his hair down before. Hadn’t even guessed that that was what it could be like, and it made his stomach flutter.

Gordon held a hand out to him. “Come here. Dance with me”

“What? No. I don’t want to touch your shitty, dirty HEV hand, dude.”

“Tsk.” Gordon, not one for being dissuaded, began to undo the buckles holding the hand of his HEV suit on, and managed to get it off after a few tough tugs. He took off the thick quilted glove underneath, and then worked on the other hand. He could see Benrey grow more and more flustered as he did; clearly he hadn’t been expecting Gordon to do this, and didn’t know how he’d wriggle himself out of it now.

With his hands now free, he held another one out to Benrey, who just looked at it like a frightened deer. Gordon rolled his eyes. He grabbed hold of one of Benrey’s crossed arms, tugging it free, and pulled him forwards. Gordon’s hand trailed down Benrey’s arm until it came to rest in his palm. 

Gordon realised, then, that he’d never touched Benrey’s skin with his own before.

Benrey looked anywhere but at Gordon, a flush quickly spreading across his cheeks. A bubble of pink Sweet Voice that Gordon couldn’t read dribbled out of his mouth as he tried to speak up in protest.

It was a silly sight, really. The normally stoic and composed guard, who acted like he had all the cards in his hand, reduced to a stammering mess under Gordon’s own. Something about it made Gordon’s heart beat just a little harder in his chest. 

Without saying anything, Gordon started moving their hands around, in a half-baked attempt at dancing. He swayed his own hips from side to side, while Benrey’s stayed static, frozen in place. 

“Is that all you got?” Gordon asked, gently teasing.

“ _Bvh_....I...” He really did look like a deer in headlights. “I don’t, uh...I never...”

As soon as Gordon caught on to what he was saying, he stopped in his tracks. “Benrey, are you trying to tell me you don’t know how to dance?”

The flush on Benrey’s cheeks got darker. “Whatever, man, not like I’d want to. Mega cringe.”

An endeared laugh tumbled out of Gordon’s throat before he could catch it, soft and loving like the rest of him. “That’s honestly the cutest thing I’ve ever heard. You’re like a little...a little...”

“Shut up!” Benrey thumped their entwined hands against Gordon’s chest. “I’m not fucking cute, man.”

That just made Gordon laugh harder, a joyful tear brought to his eye that he wiped away with their hands. “Well, let me, uh. Let me teach you how to dance, yeah?”

Benrey didn’t respond. 

“Fine. You just...” he said, as he began to swing his hips again, moving their arms around in wide circles up and down like before. “You just get into it. Move to the music, y’know.”

He pulled away to demonstrate, busting some real dad moves. (It was his right as a father, after all. He needed to get good at it before Joshy grew up.) He rolled his wrists around each other, then thrust his finger towards the sky, all the while his knees bobbed up and down in time with the beat. He closed his eyes to really get into it, grooving side to side as he switched up his dad moves. He knew full well his moves weren’t good, but that wasn’t the point. He was having fun! And as he looked up, he could see Benrey was having fun as well. He was copying some of Gordon’s epic moves with extra Benrey twists thrown in there, full on wiggling his ass, putting his whole back into it. Of all the things Gordon expected of him, that wasn’t it, but he would be wrong if he said he wasn’t thrilled.

Gordon couldn’t help it when he laughed, and Benrey looked up at him with a cheeky glint in his eyes. “What?” he asked, and it only encouraged Gordon’s giggles. 

“Good moves.” He nodded with approval. 

Slowly, the current song faded out, and the music came back in with something Gordon immediately recognised. A grin spread across his face as the ABBA started blaring.

He grabbed hold of Benrey again, who stumbled over with a little squeak. But Benrey didn’t seem to mind this time, settling into the motions with Gordon, a stupid, goofy grin that showed his teeth plastered unabashed on his face. They grooved together then, wiggling, with little touches to keep contact. Gordon twirled Benrey around, dipped him low, pulled him around the room, and Benrey didn’t complain. Gordon’s heart seemed both light and heavy in his chest, all at once. If you asked, he would have told you it must have been the exhaustion.

“Jeez, this is so cringe.” Benrey said through his grin while Gordon twirled him again.

Gordon just shook his head. “You’re so mean.”

Benrey pressed closer, showing more of his sharp, sharp teeth. “You love it, bro. You think I’m funny. You think I’m so epic and cool and want to kiss me all the time. It’s true.”

“Is it? Maybe that’s how _you_ feel, asshole.” Gordon tutted.

Benrey paused then, looking at Gordon, and Gordon paused to look at him too. There was a long moment where Gordon did nothing but look at him, and then, without meaning to, down at his lips--a betrayal of his subconscious mind--and some stupid, stupid things seemed to click into place. 

“Uh...” Benrey cleared his mouth to speak, not taking his eyes away from Gordon’s, pressing ever so slightly closer. Gordon’s heart skipped a beat. His body seemed to move on its own then, leaning forwards as his eyes flickered from Benrey’s eyes, to his mouth, to his eyes again. His hand came up to cup against Benrey’s jaw, thumb grazing past his cheekbones, trailing down to his lips. He pressed even closer forwards, and-

_Bang!_ “We heard music, Mr. Freeman!” Tommy’s voice rang through from the bust open door, and both Benrey and Gordon leapt back, pushing away from each other suddenly and violently. If Tommy had noticed what was just going on, he didn’t say anything, his eyes darting to the CD player still playing out a tinny rendition of _Lay All Your Love On Me_. “You found a CD player! We should take this back to camp!”

Gordon opened his eyes wide to blink out what the _fuck_ just happened. “Y-yeah!” he stuttered out, hand now playing nervously with the back of his head.

Tommy cheerfully picked up the CD player and scurried out the room, followed by a scowling Bubby. Coomer was last, giving a little wave before he turned, “Come along, Gordon!”

He breathed a sigh of relief, chancing a look back at Benrey. 

“Come on then, Feetman.” He winked. _Asshole._

**Author's Note:**

> 👀 my hlvrai tumblr blog is @godonfeeman if u wanted to hang......haha just kidding.......unless......


End file.
